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drosera-sundews — How to distract a thunderstorm

Published: 2012-09-29 13:16:08 +0000 UTC; Views: 951; Favourites: 29; Downloads: 21
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Description The young girl with the kite, seen above in this picture is called Jessica Surn. She may seem like a normal girl to you, and this is in fact exactly what she is, but in the village she lives, far away in the deep wilderness of east Germany, she’s called a hero. For she saved, all by herself, the village and all its people from being destroyed by a raging thunderstorm that was gaining on them, many, many years ago.

A few wise old people had already suspected that this specific storm might not have been called into existence solemnly by natural forces. It was something about the way it just suddenly appeared, the way it seemed to head specifically to their village and the overwhelming strength of the wind that carried it along. Some people thought of the wind spirits to be the cause of this unusual weather. One spirit to be exactly, an angry one.

Some people suggested trying to negotiate with this wind spirit. To beg it to spread its rage over the mountains instead of above their fragile roofs. But while researching this possibility they stumbled across a book about spirits, written by several skilled scientists. The paragraph on wind spirits immediately began with a famous quote from James Osley, a ‘said to be’ expert. This was his quote:

“Even though I have encountered more mysterious and unexisting beings than a regular man can think of on my journeys, I have never come across anything that could match a wind spirit in acting stupid and being immature. It doesn’t matter if you offer them jewels, souls, peanut butter or beg them upon your knees. Crying as hard as a cloud can rain. They simply won’t take you serious. Mark my words, there is no point, absolutely no point, in negotiating with a wind spirit. I suggest you just try an umbrella instead and wait 'till they’ve flown on.”

This did of course, scare the village people and drove them to despair. It did this so well that the people even failed to read the rest of the paragraph on wind spirits. This was very unfortunate because the rest of the paragraph contained Osley’s further research on wind spirits in which he explains what a great company wild wind spirits make, how they can cheer you up when you’re feeling sad, how loyal and friendly they are and how extremely good they are at playing card games.
Maybe if the unfortunate villagers had read this, they wouldn’t have been as stressed as they were, when the thundercloud slowly advanced. Unfortunately, they didn’t.

Of course, Jessica Surn didn’t know a thing about wind spirits. Still she managed to stop one. How she did this has remained a mystery over years. The only thing the nowadays remaining villagers (only a couple of old ladies) remember is seeing Jessica walk off to the mountains, when the shadow of the thundercloud already darkened parts of their village. She remembered how she stood in the wind, looking determined. Carrying no weapons, armor or tools besides her clothes and an old orange kite.

Many people have made up theories about Jessica. About why she went up to the top of that mountain that one day. Some think she didn’t want to see the village that was her home getting destroyed. Some think she hated her family and wanted to escape them once and for all, or even commit suicide by flying her kite into the thundercloud.

According to the villagers she somehow lured the wind spirit, who retreated from the cloud he hid in and attacked her in open air. It is said that Jessica could be seen from the village while fighting this battle. At least in the distance. It is said that it lasted several hours and that Jessica’s kite never touched the ground. The spirit kept on chasing it until Jessica managed to trick him into flying himself in a knot and falling to the ground. To die immediately afterwards.
When Jessica came back to the now sunny village, she was greeted by an applause from hundreds of hands. She’d saved the day. However, the young girl didn’t really seem to understand what a heroic deed she had just accomplished and up until the day she died, surrounded by family and at a very respectable age, she never spoke about her battle with the angry wind spirit. It therefore remained a mystery.

But if one takes a closer look at the anatomy of a wind spirit, they may discover that the story as it is told now isn’t completely accurate. Because, you see, wind spirits are very flexible beings. They can bend in almost any way they want and due to this and their massive number of tails, they almost always look as if they’ve tied themselves into knots. In fact, even if a wind spirit were to tie itself in a knot, this wouldn’t be a problem. For they can anatomically tie themselves into knots and with the same ease untie while never even getting a centimeter closer to the ground.
A wind spirit falling to the ground is also a very unbelievable scenario because, face it, wind spirits are in fact the wind itself. And the wind does never, ever fall to the ground. Nor does a wind spirit.

So this could not have actually happened.

What actually happened was that Jessica went to that mountain without any clever plans or suicidal ideas. She just went there to fly her kite now that there was a strong wind. This seems like an illogical thing to do, but you must not forget that Jessica was very young and didn’t yet understand the danger a thundercloud represented. And of course all the older people in the village failed to inform her about wind spirits because they were all freaked out due to some old guys quote in dusty book.

So Jessica just went to the mountains to fly her kite.

Another thing that should be mentioned is that the wind spirit that was causing all the trouble was in fact not angry or evil. It was just, like all wind spirits, ignorant and immature. But also lonely and bored. It didn’t mean to put a thundercloud on Jessica’s village but had simply be around the mountains because it liked mountains, when it saw the village during the night and decided to go and take a look at all those fancy lights. The spirit simply didn’t realize that taking a thundercloud along wasn’t that much of a clever idea. Wind spirits hardly ever consider that kind of things.

There is another thing curious about wind spirits. They love, they more than absolutely love the color orange. Osley once researched this and thought that it had probably something to do with trees turning orange during fall. But he wasn’t sure if the spirits likes orange because it is the color of the trees or that the trees were just clever and turned orange to lure the wind spirits into blowing the leaves of their branches. This is yet to be discovered.

Jessica and the wind spirit met on the top of the mountain. Jessica had been there for a while flying her kite and the bright orange color made the spirit fly to her instantly, leaving the village and the thundercloud, that immediately lost all of its force. What followed wasn’t an epic battle, but a pretty pleasant afternoon that Jessica spent playing with the spirit and the spirit spent playing with her and her kite until it was so tattered that it would not fly anymore. After that the spirit simply left. It never died, just like the wind it actually was.

Jessica however did die. And even nowadays, when most of the wind spirits have been tamed and predicted, a strange and mysterious breeze still blows over a graveyard at the foot of a great big mountain. It isn’t a strong breeze, and it doesn’t bother anyone, it’s just there. Some people think the graveyard is cursed or haunted. Like most people think about most graveyards. But in fact it is nothing but the lonely wind spirit. Still flying around Jessica Surn’s old grave. It senses that she is there, very close to him, but in all its still immature innocence it just doesn’t understand that she won’t play with him. That she will never let her orange kite soar through the skies ever again.
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Comments: 15

PineRain [2013-11-12 21:26:16 +0000 UTC]

awesome! Great concept!

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

drosera-sundews In reply to PineRain [2013-11-13 19:39:18 +0000 UTC]

Thank you so much  

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

Imaginary-Shadow [2013-06-25 16:45:08 +0000 UTC]

Lovely illustration, and I love the story, too!! Fantastic job~

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

drosera-sundews In reply to Imaginary-Shadow [2013-06-26 08:14:51 +0000 UTC]

Thank you very much

👍: 0 ⏩: 0

stitchpunkz [2012-09-29 13:48:10 +0000 UTC]

Did you come up with this story? It's really nice!

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drosera-sundews In reply to stitchpunkz [2012-09-29 14:10:56 +0000 UTC]

Thanks! Just randomly I guess.
hmm, I'm still suspicious. Did you read it entirely?

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

stitchpunkz In reply to drosera-sundews [2012-09-29 14:32:26 +0000 UTC]

Yes, I did

You want critique on it?

Cause I could give that if you want...

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

drosera-sundews In reply to stitchpunkz [2012-09-29 14:51:03 +0000 UTC]

O yes please! Great really! You're attention span is back

👍: 0 ⏩: 1

stitchpunkz In reply to drosera-sundews [2012-09-29 14:58:16 +0000 UTC]

Okey
First off all, I like the idea of the story
It's cute, short and the ending a bit unexpected

The way it's told however...
Well, you could really brush up on that
The way it's currently written sounds more like a rough draft, where you just wrote down everything you thought of (and I think you did)

Erm, let me try to word this better
My study is about these things so I should be able to do this
Wait, yes, got it
You're telling us what happened, the action
But the way you're telling it, the plot (oh god, I feel like I'm acting all smart, but this is at least partly so I can make better sense of it as well) is lacking

It's kinda of a list of things that happened, told from two points of view. One of them being what the villagers thought had happened and one what had actually happened

Hmm, this kind of feels a bit too general, but I'll post this now and if you have any questions, I'll try to explain better (also cause I don't want to word vomit all over you)

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drosera-sundews In reply to stitchpunkz [2012-09-29 15:37:41 +0000 UTC]

I know, you said that kind of stuff before. The problem is that no one ever reads my normal stuff because it's too long. If I would have actually written this as I would usually do, in detail, it would probrably take me a year and it would end up being sixty pages long. I don't know how I could put your advice to use and keep this story on two pages at the same time
So I think I'll have no other choice but keeping it this way even though it's not perfectly written.
Thanks for the advice though, (and I did actually work out the story before I wrote it down this time )

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stitchpunkz In reply to drosera-sundews [2012-09-29 18:14:56 +0000 UTC]

saknafsokndsomidhdmokp

I wrote a complete reply, then my browser decided to go to another page and it was lost ;_;

First of all
It's possible (interesting, but slightly macabre example is 'The Company of Wolves' by Angela Carter)

Actually, I just realised, what you might need a little more is narrative detail
Things that aren't necessary/part of the story, but kind of paint a picture

At the same time, you already have that
I dunno
Not being helpful here

Maybe I can write a couple of paragraphs for you? As some sortf example (though at the same time that can turn out as a 'I think it just sounds better if you say it slightly different' though that's at least partly what it's about)

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drosera-sundews In reply to stitchpunkz [2012-09-29 19:06:07 +0000 UTC]

O that doesn't matter. You may rewrite the entire story... I would in fact find that quite interesting to read. So if you would like it and have the time, then please go ahead!
By the way, I googled 'the company of wolves' but I only found the movie. I bet that's not what you mean right?

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stitchpunkz In reply to drosera-sundews [2012-09-29 19:09:09 +0000 UTC]

Also, I might when I've got the time
Maybe as soon as tomorrow
Maybe within a year
Dunno
But I'd love to

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drosera-sundews In reply to stitchpunkz [2012-09-29 19:17:59 +0000 UTC]

Cool! I'm looking forward to it!

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stitchpunkz In reply to drosera-sundews [2012-09-29 19:07:55 +0000 UTC]

No you have to google it in combination with the writers name

Then you'll probably find it

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