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Laylabelle97 — Price Tag Page 14
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Published: 2015-12-23 02:52:31 +0000 UTC; Views: 787; Favourites: 3; Downloads: 0
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Thank god SOMEONE told him. And if you're worried about where Douchenugget's hat went, it's in the backseat between the twins.Next:whispersbettenoir.deviantart.c…
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Comments: 11
Hello there! I am from and I am here to offer some advice!
To keep it short:
Things I like:
1. The scenes are clearly separated, so I can follow it.
2. The car is drawn pretty well, and has some highlights that bring it out from the background---nice!
3. The different shapes of the heads help me tell the people apart easily---well done!
Things to fix:
1. I did mention the car---well, in the bottom it does stick out from the background in parts that are highlighted, but there is so much black in the background it is still hard to see it. Next time try using other dark colors for the background like a dark green or purple so the black of the car is easier to see.
2. It's hard to read the words because they are so light. Next time use a dark pen instead of pencil and they will be easier to read.
3. You mentioned there are twins in the back... no offense, but I couldn't see them until I looked close. Give them a more defined outline so I can see them better.
Overall, interesting comic and I hope the guy in the trunk is rescued.
Anyway, I hope that was helpful!
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And, all I can say for the guy in the trunk is that this story takes an interesting change of genres in the next few pages
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OKay.. not sure if I want to see...
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Thank you so much for you comment, I really appreciate it. You make a really good point about using very dark greens and purples for night scenes so that objects in black can be seen better. I'll start to work with that from now on. I'm working on the next page, and I had another person tell me to darken the text. I'm going over the text in dark ink a few times to make the dialogue easier to read.
My handwriting is very scribbly, messy cursive that's hard to read, so I try to make the dialogue in my comics different from my handwriting.
And you do have a point about the twins. with all the orang in this page they do get a little lost.
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I'm glad to help out! 
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So mixing the colors together with just a little bit of black. Thanks, that helps. I look forward to practicing that
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Yes, and in fact, you don't really need black at all, unless you are absolutely desperate.
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Cool, I'll try it out
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You get kind a film-noir feeling from this, both in the subject matter and the style. The colors are nice and bold against the great darks that you've used, creating a really dramatic effect. I also love how you break through the paneling with the exhaust from the tailgate. I would recommend maybe inking in the dialogue and sound effects, so that they don't get lost among all the bold lines and shading. Really wonderful job overall!
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Thank you so much. So make the inking on the sound effects and dialogue bolder so they stand out more, got it.
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